Take nothing for granted

This blog usually sees only happy posts for the most part. Occasionally a sad or nostalgic/ raw post. The last month has not been easy.

The Japan trip blog series writeup was going along swimmingly well. Then there was a biz trip for a few days and my plan was to come back and finish writing about the last three days of the trip.

There was International day of Yoga and a multilingual class that we thoroughly enjoyed. Monday through Wednesday I had planned a rather hectic trip to cover multiple things. Every day there were two flights with 2-3 hour gap between flights just to be safe. In spite of that 5 of the 6 flights were 2+ hours late. The only flight on time was the last one.

Somewhere in the middle of visiting airport restrooms and plane restrooms, I had picked up my first UTI ever and did not know it. As fate would have it, my last but one flight started 2 hours late and landed 2 hours late as well. The next flight home was on time and had boarded. The last hour of the flight was extremely turbulent and we were not allowed to use the restroom. The pretzel bag and water did not make it easier. When we were about to land, the air hostess announced that four passengers could actually made their connections if we would run to the next flight that was boarding. We were in A12. Two of us had to run to A1. A mom and daughter had to run to A6. Rest of them were rebooked as they had luggage. I was traveling with a backpack. After running 12 gates and making it to the flight, I was huffing and puffing. The flight attendant in the next flight promptly handed me a water bottle and said “sir please take your seat. we were waiting for you two. we have to taxi right away”. I went to my seat and told the other air hostess “ I have been holding from going to the restroom for the last 90 minutes. I have to go. It is urgent”. She said “please just hang on for another 10 minutes. once we are airborne you can go. if you get up, we cannot taxi. Already everyone has been waiting for you. “

So I waited. Then the turbulence was back on as soon as we took off.. the seat belt sign didn’t come off for another hour and 10 minutes. By that time I thought my bladder was going to rupture. Finally they let me go. Then there was another lady two seats ahead with a baby that desperately needed a diaper change. She was also constantly pressing the button. Out of goodwill I held it for another 5 minutes. When I finally tried to pee in that plane, pain hit me like never before to the point I was crying. Came back, sat down and was glad that I was going to be home soon. It was late in the night and the advice nurse told me to take Tylenol and rest and come see the doctor in the morning. if anything changed run to ER.

Woke up at 6AM and was peeing blood. The next 10 days has been a blur. In and out of hospital, getting to ER, Urgent care, back to ER, getting admitted, being tested constantly, round after round of antibiotics after they found that the infection had spread all the way to my kidneys. The whole family was in shock. After sometime at the hospital, they agreed to discharge me on condition that someone at home will do the medicine infusion. San said she will get trained but her hands were shaking and she freaked out. Luckily the kids were both bold enough and volunteered to do the infusion at home.

A word of praise to Kaiser. They did an outstanding job of taking care of me, sending medicine home on time for the infusions with a proper kit, meticulous follow ups, the nurses who took care of me as well as the ER doctors, not to mention my PCP who spotted right away that something was off after the first round of antibiotics. Lost 6-7lbs in the 10 days, my vocal volume and reduced mobility on my left hand thanks to the IV.

A “thoo” for Delta airlines. Understand turbulence is not in their control, but not a single flight was on time during that trip except the last one. They have a “we are like this only!” attitude that really made me sad. The flight attendents were sympathetic and said “very sorry” after they saw me come out with tears in my eyes, but that doesn’t help.

My colleagues at work were extremely supportive as were my professional connections. I was supposed to chair two sessions at a conference. Had a lot of expectations from that experience but could not even make it. The doctor told me “you can’t afford to get another infection right after this. Avoid crowds, especially where folks have traveled from far and wide for a conference”. Had to excuse myself. Could only work a few days with my phone and one hand. Was only able to listen in to some meetings.

My angels and my friends came to cheer me up in the hospital. Now that I am. normal they are all calling me an idiot and I am getting eye rolls from everyone for being stupid. All said and done, I should be more careful and not do stupid stuff like this anymore.

The last 5 days has seen me catch up with things at work, talk with my usual volume and also try Yoga again. There are still a few tests to check no lasting damage but as of now I have passed everything with flying colors. Just have to rebuild the good bacteria in my system.

Never take anything for granted !! One minute you are smiling and next thing you know, being delirious with a 103 fever blabbering nonsense in your sleep. I have never seen San so worried in recent times. Gave the family and friends a big scare.

The middle photo was from last evening when Jr. came running to tell me that the sky was putting on a show. So we went to the front door to take photos.

This morning I took a selfie to send to my mom after doing Bodhayana Amavasai tharpanam. Need to eat some more and get back to normal.

Wanted to write a post on International Yoga day as well after that biz trip and that never happened. So sharing a few photos from that day here..

Have been out of blogging, social media for almost three weeks now. Wrote this as a cautionary tale for folks and to get back to blogging. No one cleans airport restrooms or plane toilets anymore given every plane is late and airports are under staffed with mostly disgruntled employees who are all now contract workers with no benefits. Take your own toilet paper when you travel. Avoid plane and airport toilets where possible. At the risk of losing a flight, take that damn pee break. Finding alternate flights is easier than finding alternate kidneys! Not worth it!!

Will try to slowly finish blogging about that Japan trip from Spring!

A false sense of security

Conversation with gay friends a few years ago:  "don't be fooled by the rainbow lighting in the white house. the world is not as pro gay rights as we are led to believe"

We all learned that the folks who went and registered themselves under DACA were naive. They were signing up to be on a round up list when the administration changed.

See the same thing with the MeToo movement. Women are being lulled into a false sense of security and are coming out and naming accusers. 

All those so called Twitter supporters might as well be bots who are echoing election messages for money. People who are sitting on their couches with their laptops, typing frantically on social media, offering their words of support and hashtags, cannot do anything when it comes to actually backing these women all the way to get justice. 

The country(ies) are run by the rich class that is actually part of the problem. The political class, is definitely part of the problem as power has corrupted folks into thinking they can get away with anything and usually it is a case of people scratching peoples back. 

The media will move on to the next best thing, be it toilet paper intentionally left on DJT's shoes as he boards the next plane or Melania's faux pas in Africa. 

Meanwhile the poor women will go through being shamed all over again, be forgotten with the next news cycle and the same guys who were accused will come back to their day jobs using their money, power, influence to haunt their accusers and make them disappear. 

The ones that set the example are always the creeps. Very rarely do we see justice (which again seems disproportionate) for a Cosby or a Weinstein. 

The most powerful man in the world today thinks it is okay to grab women by their body parts and he is still out there. 

So many folks were named as part of the metoo movement. The standard Modus Operandi for the perps seems to be :

1. Why did you not come forward earlier?

2. How come you cannot remember details clearly?

3. If 1 and 2 are answered, they plant a fake accuser whose credibiilty can be questioned and then use that to say "all accusers are not credible" 

4. shaming using multiple methods

Have seen this over and over and over again. 

My kid came and told me "who will believe us if something like that happened to us? no wonder no one comes forward and accuses anyone because no one will believe the woman!" and my answer was "I will definitely believe you. I am your dad". 

It is a sad day if your daughter has doubts on the world when it comes to people believing a woman's word against a man. 

Sincerely want women to band together on this. Women need to believe other women. 

Ladies, if you know a woman who believes "boys will be boys".. "locker room talk" etc. please convince that person that it is not acceptable and it is wrong. Maybe a woman can change the mind of another woman?

Nothing is worse than a mother endorsing such behavior for a son or a wife endorsing such behavior from a husband. 

I grew up in a very male chauvinistic society. Then I ended up in a country where women think they are in much better shape than any place in the world, only to see again and again that it is not much different. 

To all those brave women who are coming forward and naming accusers, the world is not ready for you. My kid is right. One man believing her is not enough. The world will come back and get you. So think twice before you come forward. All those retweets won't save you as they pale against money, power and influence in the real world.  It is not a million candles burning for you. It is one candle and a lot of mirrors. That one flickers and dies and it is total darkness. 

The most powerful country in the world saw a circus to nominate a SC judge who will decide many cases that determine the fate of women and we saw what happened.  There is no chance for ordinary people to get any justice. 

Wait a few years, till something big happens. Something real. Not Twitter rage. Some new laws and regulations when it comes to meaningful investigations and consequences for folks found guilty. A time when a woman goes in front of a panel of people where the percentage of women on the panel is same as the percentage women out there.. even then you should think twice.

A sincere request to all those who are encouraging the women who have come forward for more details on their revelations, or asking more folks to come forward.. please stay behind them to the end. Retweeing might make you feel you have done the right thing, but you are actually doing more damage to people because at the end of the day they face all the conquences while you will still be on your couch with your laptop doing the same thing. 

This post is doing the same on the other side of things, and that is not lost on me.  I am on a couch writing this, but someone needs to caution these women that they are not being backed up as they might think.

The world is not ready for Metoo

Wish it was!

Resistance is futile..

Had sent an email to both kids a few days ago after someone forwarded me this article on healthy food vs. unhealthy food.

My mail to the kids with the subject "Why I don't want you to eat outside" :

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Dear (Jr. and LO),

please read this report.

outside food is not nutricious. lunchables, school lunches, packaged foods etc. are all bad.

http://cspinet.org/new/201303281.html

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Jr.'s reply :

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Not true! You can eat out once in a while but never always!

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Little One's reply :

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appa it is kind of good to eat bad food then your body will get energy.

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Obviously, they know everything and they also have an answer for everything.

We made the mistake of letting the kids pick what they want for snack time in school and that has slowly gone from granola bars and brownies to things called skinny cow, ding dongs (!?), Pirates booty !?

I am pretty much tired of fighting the system. My personal advertisement budget for health foods is not as good as these companies and I also don't have the equivalent time of a few hundred people marketing department.

No amount of effort in me packaging a banana or idly will appeal to these kids like the "ding dongs".

Jr. wanted popcorn. We have a popcorn maker at home. So I picked the bottle of popping corn the other day thinking "this is probably some genetically modfied stuff that will slowly turn into poison if left in her intestines.. but this is the best option in this aisle". She quickly insisted on putting that back and picking up the Orville Redenbacker Movie Theater butter flavored popcorn saying "Daddy, this one tastes good. I have had it in my friends place. We NEED this!"

That one had fat and sugar ratings (even if that was a conservative estimate to con consumers.. for who is to know if they are the real values given the type of money they spend to rig the system) were over the top.  I had to fight to get plain corn to pop!

The only good thing that was done? Told her that if she takes the box of things called "skinny cow" which was clever advertising but creates a fat kid in all probability, she has to buy some fruit. So she picked not fresh fruit, but Dole's pre packaged fruit bits in guess what ? Sugar syrup!

As a dad I feel frustrated trying to mandate these things in the house. Pretty soon we will have to start showing them what happens to folks who eat too much sugar with gory pictures and videos. 

We don't need North Korean nut jobs to threaten our country. We have our own guys who put these sugary processed foods on the shelves, threatening our very future. Our kids!