Faith Faith Faith

Faith is an interesting thing.. it makes you do things that are ingrained in you from childhood. Everytime I lose something and I have to find it in a time sensitive way, subconsciously say a prayer to Ganesha and say "will light a camphor light(karpooram) for 10 paise at the local temple".. 

a. we don't get camphor lights in the US that easily

b. there is no 10 paise anymore

c. local temple can be anything but was originally intended for Vembadi Vinayagar, a little ganesha under a pipal tree that I have circled with prayers to remove obstacles real and imaginary..

But it gets done.. and we are not even talking about if we actually found the thing on time or not.

In 2014 my MIL was going for a bone marrow test and in pure panic mode I prayed to my family deity (Gunaseelam perumal) that if the test came negative for cancer, will go shave my head in the temple. That was more of an extreme case of the camphor lighting thing.. 

Have made at least 6 trips to India since that time but never got the opportunity to go visit Gunaseelam. Faith is interesting.. seeing your family deity is not up to you, it is up to your deity.. or so the saying goes! Guess on this short trip to see my dad, there was no agenda. 

Three weeks ago, was lying in a hospital bed myself, dreading some worse case scenarios, which fortunately turned out to be something a lot less threatening. While there, the thought of unfinished business with god somehow bubbled up to the top of the already buffering thought process.  What if I died and did not do the "mottai"? After all the bone marrow test for MIL had come out negative! 

The original plan was to just go alone with a driver and get things done and get back. Then my parents said the words "Can we come with you?".. In case you didn't get the reason Faith got mentioned three times in the title, "you cannot say no to someone when they ask to come to a temple with you".. My dad was bedridden two weeks ago and he barely started walking again. An adult in diapers who just started walking, coming on a day trip where we spend 11 hours in the car and 3 hours in a temple is no joke. 

Somehow, we told ourselves, if it was meant to be, we will make it. I did a risk mitigation plan that would make any project manager proud and we left at 3AM. It was still raininig in Chennai but we were off to a flying start.. We had one stop for 25 minutes and were back on the road. 

Given this is my n'th mottai at Gunaseelam, the whole thing was done in 7 minutes.. then came the best part. There was water in the river that flows to the temple! Had a great time taking a dip in the river and have the fishes nibble at me. We were on a deadline and I had to pull myself out of the water to go in and finish the rest of the prayer. 

Our driver and some total strangers helped me navigate a wheel chair through the temple. The priest knows our family and was extremely nice and made sure my dad got to see the deity up close. 

On our way out a puppy came up and lay down under our vehicle. This one knew how to put on a sad face like a pro..

It was time to drive back. My dad is like a kid who just got his tonsils out and knows that his parents won't say "no" to anything... we just got out of the temple and he mumbles "elaneer.. I want elaneer". He wanted coconut water. Was not even sure if this is coconut water season and we were watching the road for it and sure enough we found a vendor selling fresh coconut water. It is not a good idea for a person of his age to drink that instead of lunch. We stopped at an A2B for lunch and it was really delicious. Had a full course meal. As an added bonus this place had a wheelchair ramp!

Then came the bombshell from my dad "I want to use the restroom". That was not part of the plan. It was going to be diapers all the way. But a kid without his tonsils... is a kid without his tonsils. The restrooms here are not typically wheelchair accessible. They are simply not for anyone who is not fit and can manoeuvre around a potty, a door that swishes past the potty with millimeter tolerance and a bunch of taps and buckets on the floor that are trip hazards. In what can only be described as a houdini move, managed to get my kid to go potty and get him diapy changed. That coconut water was a bad idea. Our driver concurred. 

The rest of the drive back was calm and serene. There were cops every 100 feet. So I started counting cops. After 270, I stopped counting. That was only on one side of the road from Dindivanam to Melmaruvaththur. My mind boggled at the efficiency of this whole security apparatus with so many cops just standing on the roadside doing nothing.. then again, maybe this system works, who knows! We actually slowed down to ask one of the cops to find out what the big deal was. He proudly answered "The Chief minister of Tamil Nadu is making his way back to Chennai on the same route!"

We made a dash for it to avoid his motorcade and made it back in exactly 14 hours. For a few minutes after reaching could not find my legs.. had let my dad doze off on me. . . which reminded me of my kids dozing off on me on another recent trip.

It has been another interesting day. 

A picture that says it all..

and a short video of the days experience.. 

It is always a great feeling taking a dip in the river.. mottai or not. Was glad to see my parents smiling again, even if for one day! 

Now the only thought in my head is "the mosquitoes are going to get me good tonight with this exposed scalp.. they will suck my brains dry and I might actually wake up smarter!"

My head feels lighter already, both literally and figuratively...

I am so not ready for this

Today my little girl walked into the house wearing long earings.. something I ahve not seen her wear before. So asked her for a portrait picture and she was okay.

Think she sees me as a hopeless person who is coming to terms with the fact that she will be going to college soon. Understanding facts and accepting them are two different things, even if it means you have gone through this experiene before on the other side. It is not much different from being a college kid who drove around everywhere on a bicycle, wishing the car drivers were more careful and when you get behind the wheel, wishing the cyclists were more careful.. or being an engineer wishing your manager grasped what your thought process was and suddenly managing a large group and wishing the engineers knew the larger constraints.. every story has a side.. and this time I want to go find that episode of Barney called Happy Mad Silly Sad.. to cheer myself up. 

Jr. was a bigtime Barney fan. However she was not the one who introduced me to Barney.. it was my college senior Vish's daughter Harita who would make me watch Barney with her everytime I visited their apartment. Then Barney was forgotten only to be played three times a day .. because Barney was the key to open Jr.'s mouth to feed her! Eventually he was replaced by the Metti Oli title song which I recorded on a VHS cassette and had to play it 5 times to finish dinner. We could not watch it past the 5th time or you would have seen headlines like "sunnyvale parents in murder suicide after being forced to watch tamil soap opera title song 1000 times a month"..  Thankfully we are past all that.. or are we?! 

We digress as usual. Now another digress about the digress..

Yours truly has been on a wait list to attend a Vipasana medidation course. It is not easy to get into this one. It was highly recommended by my yoga teacher friends. They are eagerly awaiting to see if this will help me. . It is a course where you are not allowed to speak or make eye contact with people.. My family has already started a pool of sorts on which day of the course, they will be kicking me out and accepting that their practice has failed. Readers of the blog already know how highly my family regards my ability to go on about random topics.. or my general aimlessness when it comes to conversation..

Where were we?  Jr., Earings, College, Portrait, College, Barney, rambling.. okay.. back to portraits.

Jr. was just a few months old. She was able to hold her head. We had just started taking her out to public places. Day 40 we took her to Livermore temple. Then we went for a drive along route 1. That following winter was cold. So we spent time at Great mall.. walking the entire mall with her in a stroller.. and we came across this portrait setup in the middle of the mall. We went for it. They were hesitant about a child this small.. but we were literally holding her from behind (but the hand was covered with a cloth). It was like a magic trick. She was looking at mom and grandma and smiling.. The original hangs on a frame in my office.. this is a photo of the photo.. 

Even today sometimes that is the Jr. I see.. always smiling..  and just like that she is not a kid anymore! 

Went searching for some old photos and realized that the hard drive on which they were stored is corrupted. Have to find a way to back them up more reliably. Those WD passport drives are probably guaranteed for 10 years.. time flies! 

These screensavers are going to make things more difficult, as the kids go to college. 

Right now it is not just the kids growing up.. I am growing up as well. . . 

Golu 2019

The last month has been busy.. the kids are both in high school, the travel, school calendars are blocked to a point of exhaustion.. Then comes Navarathri festival. 

This year was a mixed bag. Could visit folks only on three days.. The rest of the days were spent in pick up and drop off duties or in meetings. Also the kids did not dress up even once and visit any Golu. That was a new low. 

There were games to be played, bands to be marched in, or the self imposed ban on attending functions while on periods. In any case, someone had to step up and dress up with San.. especially after day one when I told everyone I was ready to go in my T-shirt and shorts... 

There was a lot of shaming and I decided to match her Sari.. there were a lot of compliments from friends, partly because they were all so used to seeing me in the same T-shirt that anything else was a step up. 

Then I decided to do it the other two days of golu hopping as well. . . the end result .. a photomerge to remember.. 

This year the golus saw a lot of antique dolls that were inheritences for the ladies from their grandparents.. some of them were 100 years old handed down generations.. and they are all making their way to the bay area.. Cupertino and Fremont are the New Mylapore and New Mambalam.. have said that before and will say it again!

There were also a these miniature dolls with amazing detail. None of them are more than 3-4 inches in any dimension but the intricate color work is mind boggling.

My favorite from this year..

For the first time all the photos from the Golus were taking with an iPhone 11 Pro Max.. the new phone came just in time for the Golu season and is still being figured out.. 

Slide shows of the golus..

now for the individual doll portraits.. at least these dolls were unique across the golus I attended this year.. the iPhone has a neat portrait feature and if the dolls are lifelike, it takes portraits and enhances them automatically.. to me that is a measure of how life like the dolls are..

and finally, the photoshop masterpiece..that made the experience a fun one!

This blog has been capturing local golus for almost 15 years now.. hope to keep doing that over the years.. it has been one constant that has held over time for this blog!

Happy Vijayadasami to everyone! May the start of this academic year be a good and fruitful one!