social study

The unruly teacher

It is 60 day challenge time at Bikram Yoga. So I go whenever I can. My timetable is all over the place. Started a day with Yoga at 5:30AM, so I could come home just in time to wake up the little one and drop Jr. in school. After what was a very very long day at work, thought I would end the day with yoga as well by going to the 8:30 PM class. My plan was flawed as I ended up working till midnight. But that is not the topic of the post. 

Got to the hot room and was pleasantly surprised to see the noise level in the room being high, a good ten minutes before class. Usually folks are very quiet in the room and if they have to talk to someone, they talk in hushed tones. 

Turned out that someone had invited a whole bunch of their unsuspecting friends to come do Bikram Yoga for the first time. There were group pictures prior to the class and a lot of smiling and giggling and I was thinking "these people have no idea what they have signed up for!  this is going to be an interesting class". 

Five minutes into class, a few more folks rolled in and they were all first timers. It was definitely going to be an interesting class.

The group was not particularly receptive to the teachers instructions. Refusal to give up chewing gum, taking pictures with cell phone when the teacher was not looking, talking, random walking around the mat, drinking water while others were trying to balance on one leg, and the list goes on. It was like they were checking off an endless list of "don'ts" on the Yoga etiquette printout that we used to get as beginner students. Then a few people started leaving the room, 30 minutes into class.The teacher did her best to stop them and make them just stay on the mat, but they did not listen to her.

Something snapped and I got mad for a few seconds. Then I looked at the teacher who came back to the podium from the back of the class. She had a very determined look on her face, to make sure the rest of the students gave it everything they got. It was like watching world class management in action. It is easy to have a bunch of students who are all responding to your dialogue. It is not easy when there is a walkout of sorts going on. With amazing grace, she kept the class going and pushed everyone to do their best. 

When I saw her take her two deep breaths and go "this is very unusual for a Bikram Yoga class. You guys, focus on yourself in the mirror", something changed. I went into "look only at yourself, look only at yourself" mode. Got  tunnel vision at my reflection and that changed the class entirely!

It was like I was alone with myself and everything else disappeared. This was a very unusual experience. My eyes went "bokeh" on the background ! Didn't think that was even possible. 

Usually I am beat at 8:30 in the evening after a long day that started before 5AM, but there was a steely determination to do my best, lead by example, not let down a teacher who was giving it everything, and most of all, do the right thing by myself and work as hard as I could after having made it into the room.

After class, I told the teacher "you really inspired me today, the way you handled the class and kept going" and she smiled and said

"well, they were all your teachers Sundar. they taught you the importance of focusing on yourself". 

and that was so true!

Every day we learn things, in the most unexpected ways.

Radical

I keep hearing the term "radicalized" and "radicalization" in casual conversations with people these days. Can only imagine what it must be like listening to news. So what is all this about being a "radical"? 

As a kid my definition of radical was a group of atoms that was free to attach to another group of atoms. 

The other definition is "affecting the fundamental nature of something, far reaching or thorough" and apparently that is what is being talked about, "Far reaching".

For lack of a better analogy, let us say there are multiple folks who want to go from various parts of the bay area to the golden gate bridge. If I had to go there I would take highway 101. Sure bet in my opinion and have been driving on it for many years. Know when to change to which lane, where to expect traffic, know I will get there.  If you ask anyone else in our house, chances are they will also say "take 101. best way"

There may be others who will bet on 280 for their own reasons. They will also get to the golden gate. Might be faster or slower, but they will get there and to them it is a safe bet.

There might even be a guy who says "I have a jet pack. I can get there much faster by going up to 2000 feet and going down". He may be right, he may be wrong. The jet pack might work for him, who knows?! Hopefully he does reach as well.

If a new family visits us here and they have never travelled to SFO, we might recommend them through 101 while a different family might suggest 280. Or they might just say "let me use Google maps to decide which route to take based on traffic info. that is crowdsourced"

Where am I going with all this?

Religion mostly provides some kind of route to a destination which most of us are worried about or cannot necessarily deal with until we die. Salvation! 

We will all swear by our religions as a sure bet to reach the other side based on our own lifes experiences, experiences of others we take for granted that are passed on through generations. Most of the time it is information that we cannot rely on as it is embellished over time and it seems to be a very rare event when someone seems to have died and come back to tell us what is on the other side. There is no dearth of smart people on the planet who can explain things by making us look here, there, inward, outward, etc. etc.

At the end of the day, there is no problem with people picking a comforable route to reach their destination. 

The problem is when one says emphatically that "my route is the only route. all other routes are false". It would be great if everyone got to go on a rotation program with different religions, much like a new college grad goes through different departments in a company before joining a particular group. It would be like we all get to try 101 and 280 or that jet pack if we can get our hands on it and see which route we prefer. Unfortunately, that is not realistic. 

What we could do is to acknowledge that different people will have their own comfort zones and let people go through their own routes. While this seems to be simple enough to say "live and let live", it may not be the real problem. It is all about money. That is a bigger problem that is beyond salvation of any kind. However, live and let live is a good place to start.

When I hear someone say "all muslims are terrorists", that person has been radicalized to believe something that is not true. It is as radical as folks who are chanting "death to America". 

There was a recent conversation with a friend who asked me "Most of the Indians I know in the bay area are so far right that they will put the tea party guys look like Bernie Sanders, yet you are preaching live and let live?" 

In all honesty I told him "the average american kid today is not getting an education on the world. they won't know the difference between India, Pakistan, Malaysia, Iran or Syria or for that matter a difference between different religions. My kids might know their world history and geography but that is not enough. It is like being a safe driver on a freeway where a drunk guy is coming in the wrong direction. End result is not going to be good for either driver. There are folks teaching their kids to hate, based on the fact that other kids are of a different skin color or wear a scarf or turban of some kind. My kids could wear a dupatta on their head and could be the target of a hate crime. I want to make sure that I support a live and let live policy and counter this hate"

I also acknowledged that islamophobia is very high among Hindu households that we interact with here in the bay area. Even on the recent India trip, we had many conversations with folks who belive that the Muslim population in India is increasing dispropotionately, not because more people are believing in Islam or converting to the religion, but because the Muslim folks are on a drive to increase their population where they are a local minority, irrespective of the quality of life they can give their kids.

A relative told me "while other communities are stopping with one or two kids, Muslim families are having four or five plus kids, the families tend to be poor and the kids are not educated and this in turn, feeds a dependence on their religious links to sponsor them and in return they are willing to do anything for their sponsors who are invariably people from the middle east with an agenda to create supporters in India". 

I am not sure if that is what is going on, as this sounds like how things were in Indian villages post Independence irrespective of religion. More kids meant more income and it could simply be that the poor folks are living in the past and economic and religious demographics are being mixed up.

What was clear to me after those conversations, was that the problems are not all about whose route is better. It is about the thought that there is strength in numbers, money and power! 

We are all pawns in an elaborate game played by folks who control the money. Most of what we hear is one side of a story that manages to reach us and the stories with money behind them invariably reach us better.

It is going to take the parents of today a herculean effort to make sure that their bigotry is not passed on to the kids. Our kids don't need to learn to hate. They could learn to love and accept diversity and differences. We need to educate our kids better. Not just our kids. All kids! Yes, I sound like an ad for "no child left behind!" that too for an education on social sciences in a world where math and science are being ignored to accomodate spreading more bigotry.

When I hear what is happening in our kids schools based on the stories they tell me, my stomach churns. In spite of what we teach them at home, they are becoming who they are based on the sum total of their experiences in and outside the house. They are smart and inquisitive and will absorb everything like a sponge. Sometimes I just cry because there are no decent answers to their questions. 

Think it was Deming who said "In god we trust. Everyone else bring data".

The way the world is going, we might have to ask God to bring data as well.

As for "radicalization", for anything to reach far, there are two forces behind it. A push and a pull. The pull for radicalization is there in every shape and form with every over zealous preacher saying "only route xyz can save you!". In spite of that pull existing, not everyone takes a radical view.

It also needs a push. Either the push is a mental defect of some kind in some individuals, or a society that creates a situation where people around the person push that person closer to what is pulling. The youth of today don't need that push. The more we teach our kids to hate, or fear people and things that are different from them, the more the push.

Actually like the Chinese folks I interact with in Asia. They work hard, play hard and religion doesn't seem to be a big part of the day to day life and they are doing fine. They think they are all going to a nice place after thus life and don't seem too worried. The Chinese folks in Cupertino though, seem to be very much like the desi folks when it comes to religious prejudices. The melting pot that is the US of A does seem to do strange things to folks when they melt in.

As we close down on 2015, it is my sincere hope that we all spread a message of peace and do our best to educate everyone around us on going after facts, instead of made up stuff on FB and Whatsapp! Teach your kids to be nice to all their classmates. We are working on it at home.

Just indifferent to Paris

Yesterday there was a lot of watercooler talk at work. Given I don't have any social apps on my phone since the "Vrath" and I stopped listening to the radio while driving to and from work, was living in my own world. A few of my coworkers broke the news to me that 50 plus people were dead in Paris and there were multiple co-ordinated terror attacks and a hostage situation. 

When I came home Jr. asked me "Appa, do you know that there is a terror attack in Paris?" and I responded "yes". The little one chimed in with "Good thing your friend is back in the USA!" 

Somehow, I did not feel like reacting to this last night, with the usual :

- change my profile picture with a superimposed French flag

- write a one line status update to say how I feel for the French

- go like those new profile pictures 

etc. etc.

Those things don't do diddly squat towards a root cause fix.

My friends who are living in a parallel universe with exclusive news from Fox are quick to point out how "all muslims are terrorists" yet again. 

I am no saint. I have my share of bigotry, when looking up to my gun owning friends for an answer, everytime some idiot or deranged person goes on a rampage killing a few dozen people at some college or school or movie theater. Why should every gun owner apologize for the doings of some "deranged person"? It is not fair, because not all gun owners are mass shooters,  much the same way every muslim doesn't need to apologize for what happened in Paris because all muslims or not terrorists. 

We live in a world which is very well connected but we are also numb and immune to a lot of things because they are "out of sight and out of mind". We as a people need to understand that what goes around comes around. 

Have not seen many friends change their profile pictures to make a statement that said, what was happening in Syria to hundreds of thousands of innocent people was wrong, even when that four year old floated onto the european coast. When we are expected to feel so strongly for a 120 Parisians compared to 120,000 Syrians, there is something wrong with this world. 

The potential of human beings is not ratio'ed out based on their nationality or religion. 

Some of my friends have actually come out and said  "terrorism has a religion, it is called Islam"!

Well, show me a religion and I will show you a terrorist who claims he belongs to that religion and he is doing whatever he is doing, because of his religion. There are even buddhist terrorists in today's world! Religion is a means to an end. When the means become the end, we have a problem.

Also, nut job is a nut job in any part of the world, irrespective of religion. If folks are willing to blow themselves up or willing to be blown to bits in the name of defending god and country, it is time to rethink the solution to the problem. It is unlikely that we will eliminate religion. We can eliminate socio economic and political divides that are created by religious differences.

We need to see everyone the way we expect others to see us. If we are indifferent to the world, sooner or later the world will be indifferent to us. 

Can see that happen to me already. I have closed my window to the world. There was a time when I used to meet friends for lunch on a regular basis, meet old collegues, have tea with friends at home, call my family in India, on a more regular basis and stay in touch. Those things have dwindled down in favor of bowing down to my new god, the almighty USD!  In my attempt to reach his potus feet as fast as possible (it is an American god, pretty sure, it is a very male chauvinistic HIM.. because if it was a HER, the god will be worth only 65 cents..), I have changed a lot of priorities. 

Also given that every 15 -20 days there is a terror attack, drone strike, mass shooting and the occasional natural calamity in the form of earthquakes, tsunamis and heavy rain or floods, one feels the need to automate the obligatory condolence and solidarity messages on social media to say "I am with the crowd". 

What really gets me more than the terror attacks, is the quick response of the media in the US, to justify their phobias and their previous propaganda. This is specially true of Fox news clips that folks are sharing with me on Facebook.

Going forward, you will not see me post solidarity messages for anything. Yours truly will be happy to be one with himself and be able to not flinch, the next time someone says "terror attacks in abc or xyz". 

It is time for us to show that the USA, IS the greatest country in the world, not because it can proclaim itself so, based on the value of the USD and the number of weapons it has, but because it is able to stand up for those who cannot stand up for themselves. 

If you can proclaim "non-violence" you don't even have to enforce "non-violence". If you proclaim violence, you will only be enforcing more violence in a vicsious never ending cycle. 

When I wrote that the US should not go to war in Iraq after 9/11 a lot of folks were upset with me. That vendetta war and the destabilization of the middle east has left us scars that will last a long time. Now there is a call for war with the middle east without knowing who we are fighting.

All the rhetoric that pits people against people in increasing numbers, is not going to help. 

Both Obama and Hollande are saying "Unity" will help us get through this. 

I agree.

It is time to Unite with the folks in the middle east and share their pain. It will help us get through this, not tomorrow or the day after, but maybe in this lifetime! It will get us to resolve all that is wrong with the world, much faster than another dozen drone strikes or by sitting in the comfort of our living room changing profile pictures.

It is time to spread some peace people! 

ps. See myself right now as part of the problem, not part of a solution. The solution is peace, not war. So if I don't speak up for peace now, I am just fueling the fire. You cannot fight fire with fire. You fight violence with peace, not with more violence.