A thousand moons

Last week was eventful for the family. My in-laws visited us. San's uncle from Australia also visited us. The big event?

My MIL's dad's brother crossed a 1000 moons! It is a big deal in South India and there is a grand celebration

- when a person crosses a 1000 full moons

- is still married to the same person 

The couple get to perform a prayer that is a mix of "thank you god for the 1000 moons and the happy married life" and a wish "for many more moons". Once they finish the ceremony, they get some kind of rock star status and everyone gets their blessings. In Chennai (Madras) where I grew up, this function is so auspicious that once the couple finish the prayer, folks who were not invited to the function just show up in a long line to fall at the couples feet to get their blessings. 

Used to see a few of these ceremonies as a kid. They are rare events in a place where life expectancy for men was 62 and women was 64 twenty years ago. A thousand moons is approximately 29,501 days .. and happens close to the persons 80th birthday. 

Given most of the folks who are in their 80's got married very young (some of it was child marriage), the ladies who survive this ceremony should actually be the rock stars.. at least that is my humble opinion. Putting up with any guy for those kind of periods deserves a lifetime achievement award. 

In recent memory, I have attended three of these ceremonies. 

First in 2005 (San was pregnant with the little one then and Jr. was a toddler) we attended my maternal grandpa-grandmas function. Still have great memories from that one.

Then in 2007 when the little one was 14 months old, we went for San's paternal grand parents ceremony. Was mostly inside a dark and dingy room in the marriage hall taking care of the little one, who was very cranky and almost missed most of the happenings. (have only a few photos from that event on my camera rolls!). It was a great party of sorts again with a large family.

Then there was last weekend. San's maternal grand-uncle celebrated it. Given he is local, they celebrated it here instead of in India. How they managed to get enough folks well versed in the Vedas to do the recitation and prayers was in itself impressive, not to mention them going through a long ceremony with a smile.

They reminded me a lot of my own grandparents. When a guy who is 80 can make his lady smile for his jokes and make her blush at times, after being married to her for what appears to be a jillion years, it is more than an example for the younger generation.

You get a glimpse of what it takes to have a long and happy married life.

I realized there is a lot of work to do on my joke list!

The next generation (my parents, in-laws, uncles and aunts on both my side and Sangeetha's side of the family) are all getting around the 70 year mark.

Our sincere hope that a lot of them make it to a 1000 moons and we get to see more such ceremonies in this lifetime.

We also got to see Jr. dress up in her half saree for this occasion. She is the same height as her mother now and has declared herself a teen, even though she has a few months to go before her 13th birthday.

Now the in-laws and Uncle have gone back, the house feels empty, save for the occasional fighting between Jr. and the little one.

San and me have only another 36+ years to go.. just typing that out made me want to go to the bathroom.

I plan to interview these people in detail and find out more about their winning strategies. 

Appropriate conversations

The kids are back in the house. Our in-laws are also here. We have a full house and it feels great! 

We are back into funny conversations.

Kids are watching something on the TV from Netflix online. Suddenly Jr. (who let me remind you is not yet 13) gets the remote and starts forwarding something.

Me: Why are you forwarding it. Let me watch it.

Jr.: Appa, don't think it is appropriate to watch. that is why I am forwarding it

Little one (not yet 10) chimes in: Yes appa. that part she is forwarding is not appropriate

Me : !!!!! Appropriate for who? Me? or You? and if you know it is not appropriate, that means you have already watched it! what is going on here?

They both had a sheepish grin and were in a rush to talk over each other to offer an explanation. Apparently some boy kisses a girl in those forwarded minutes of "Good luck Charlie". Apparently, they fast forwarded it the first time they watched it also! Finally... "appa"-rently, they were more embarrased to watching me, watch it than they were, during the previous time they saw the episode.

Wasn't exactly sure if I should be happy or mad or sad for the fact that

- they are watching this

- they think the age appropriateness is for ME

- or for the fact they still had some respect for me that they would not watch it in front of me. 

Time will tell. 

Taking sides at a young age

Given my iPhone 5S is nearing its 2 year contract, I can get an upgrade to the 6 or 7 or whatever comes by November. 

Jr. already has got her own 5S and her iPhone 4S is now a hand me down to the little one. I have since been getting an earfull on how the 4S is useless! It has no memory. It has a poor battery life and keeps losing charge. It is slow and there is a long list of complaints. 

Also the little one is hoping that I get the new phone and she automatically gets my current phone as a hand me down... with a phone number. She now has a busy calendar and friends to call on play dates.. which will soon be called "hangouts"

Another thing I learned is that when a girl goes from elementary school to middle school and does the same thing with the same friends in the same houses, it still goes by a different name. It is not a Playdate anymore. It is a "hangout". 

Life was simpler when I was a kid. Same cricket bat, same electric box used as stumps, same bunch of boys.. same rules for what gets called a 4,6 or out. None of this playdate vs. hangout stuff. We didn't even have a name for when we all got together and played cricket or table tennis or went to the beach on our bicycles.

Given all the playdates and possible future hangouts, the little one made us wander to the phone section in target to "check out" the phone deals. Of course she points to a 5S and goes "it is 40$ per month ONLY appa!" 

If ONLY she knew what that ONLY meant for a two year contract! That is when San takes her to the wall and goes "why dont you pick one of these phones. they are larger, have more memory and come with cheaper plans"

The little one wanders through the display and comes back to us and goes 

"that wall is ENTIRELY full of Android crap!" 

I burst out laughing but looked the other way.

Jr. and San were shocked by the way she said it with all that frustration.

Given San uses a Xiaomi Android phone, not sure how she took it.

Looks like we have an "i-ddict" in the house. They got this one young.. 

Now we wait for November.