Newceedeeophobia
Sunday, January 25, 2009 at 9:14PM You will not find that word in the dictionary. It is a rare problem found in three year olds (and is known to extend even to six year olds) who have a fixation with a particular CD that plays day in and day out when we are driving.
The symptoms are observed usually the day a new music album or movie album is purchased and inserted into the CD player.
Usual signs include a loud scream of protest, with some tears running down the face accompanied by whimpers of "I don't want this new CD. I only want _______ !"
To the untrained parent, this is a very tricky thing to deal with. Sometimes the elders might even consider this move by the kids as "abshagun" or inauspicious! A new CD is getting inserted into the disk drive for the first time and there is wailing as though someone has died in the disc player!
Scientific minded parents are equally baffled by Newceedeeophobia (or NewCDophobia as the American slang dictionary would eventually call it). "How could this kid who embraced this previous CD, not know that this one would be equally better? Did the kid not learn from the previous experiences?" The answer as explained by Dr. Narayanöhe of the BOGUS Institute is a resounding "No".
Based on intense research conducted using a three year old, who for the sake of annonymity will be referred to here as the little one, it appears as though the kid always needs a bribe to listen to anything new. Once you get the LO into the preview hearing, favorites are picked, song requests are made, and a new fixation is born. At that point, any refusal to comply to demands, on going to that song will be treated with Newceedeeophobia!
A side effect has also been observed. In the case of a CD with multiple songs which make the cut, only "one" song will be picked and it will have to be the starting song when her holiness gets into the vehicle.
Another dangerous side effect is that grown women have shown similar milder forms of this rare affliction where NPR will automatically be switched off and replaced with a music CD from the subcontinent. The new strain in the younger kids just seems to be a more radical form the old strain! One song in one CD only as opposed to any song in any CD replacing radio!
If these trends continue projects Dr. Narayanöhe, soon we will have to start with a particular word or paragraph or chime in a certain song in a certain CD when the ignition key is turned on in the automobile! Scary indeed for future generation daddys!
Currently there seems to be no cure for Newceedeeophobia and the BOGUS institute is working on one.
ps. We are now officially parked in what is called the "monkey song", if you catch my drift...
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AR Rahman, ARR, BOGUS, CD, little one, music, newceedeeophobia, raising kids, things kids say