How hard can it be to say sorry to your dad?
Especially after you have just kicked him hard
that too after he begged you to come drink your milk before going to bed
not once , not twice, but close to twenty times
when holding that glass in his hand that long alone was enough to cause pain.
How hard can it really be?
Why do you have to cry a lot but still not be able to come out and say the magic word, knowing that all will be forgiven (or already has been) and the saying sorry is more of a token gesture
why would you not say sorry even after your big sister tells you that what you did was plain wrong and all it takes is one word
why not, even after your big sister asks you "you can't say it because you are crying, do you want me to say sorry to daddy for you?" and you nod your head "no" in between all the crying and would still not say sorry?
was it because your daddy told you that he won't love you if you keep saying "I hate my sister" or call her names?
was it really worth kicking me in the leg and falling backwards and hurting yourself in the process?
will you remember any of the stuff you did tonight, when you wake up in the morning and ask for my arm to put your head on and say "can we just sleep for five more minutes?"
Probably not.
But you might read this post twenty years from now and realize what you put your dad through, on a regular basis.
Here's to morning...
ps. Should tell my mother that compared to the little one, I was an angel. She might actually agree.
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Wednesday, September 9, 2009 at 10:36PM 
