The many degrees of "relaxation"

Today was a very special yoga day. Bikram Yoga San Jose had a special class at 10AM with Rajashree Choudhury teaching the class.

We have heard so much about her teaching style and how special her class is from the teachers. So it was a not to miss experience. A lot of times I end up missing classes taught by visiting teachers because of the travel schedule. Was fortunate to be in town to attend this class.

The dialogue in every Bikram yoga class is the same. The time for every class is the same 90 minutes but the teachers are a broad spectrum. On one side we have the high energy fire breathing dragon drill seargents and on the other side we have the hypnotic horse whisperers. Then there are varying mixes of the two combinations. The end result after the class is more or less the same. You are completely drained of thought and you are happy to go out into the world, all zoned out! 

Once in a while you get someone on either extreme who can make you feel more zoned out than you think was possible. Not talking about doing a pose deeper or more correct to the form during class here...

It is about a certain silence in your head that is just quieter than the usual. We should have a scale to quantify silence, that is exponential like the Decibel scale or the Richter scale.

Maybe "silence" is the wrong word here as this is not the opposite of noise. It is more than just the absence of sound. It the absence of any sensory data going into your brain to disturb you. 

We had a great class today where Rajashree took us through the usual 90 minute routine with some tidbits of information thrown in. Most of them were about why we do what we do in class and encouraging us to persevere.  

Then when the poses and final breathing was over and we were all stretched out on the mats, she started talking softly, telling us how to relax. There are one or two teachers who try this by saying "relax your neck, your shoulders, your hips... " and they make you consciously relax your body head to toe. What we heard today was different. It was advice, technique and hypnotism at work. 

After a few minutes of listening to her talk, I had no idea what she was even saying! It was almost a whisper. It was like being submerged in a tank of water or what the astronauts decribe as part of their space walk experience. You know there is a tether connecting you to the world but it seems to be getting more and more distant as time passes.

Got a tingling sensation in the left side of my head after a few minutes into this "whispering shavasana". Usually tingles in the hot room means that blood is flowing to that part of your body for the first time in a long time. Within a few minutes there were tingling sensations all over my brain and at that point the whisper became very faint.

Then everyone clapped for some reason and was back to staring at the light on the ceiling. It was like coming back out of anesthesia after a surgery and staring at the lights or that is the closest I can explain what happened after being "so far out there".

Had been in shavasana for more than 15 minutes. For a person who runs out at the end of 90 minutes on any given day because of a conference call to attend or a kid to pick up from some class on the way home, the extra 15 minutes is a luxury. Today it was a real lesson. Now I know why the teachers say "missing the 2 minute shavasana at the end of class is like working very hard, then forgetting to collect your paycheck". 

Going to stay on the mat after class for longer times, at least on weekend classes or Friday evenings going forward. 

Todays class was like a power surge that forcibly reset the hardware in my head. Now the trick is to relive this experience after every yoga class!

After class we got to talk to Rajashree for a few minutes.  Jr. had come to BYSJ so she could see what this was all about and also clicked a picture.

Wanted to tell her so many things. Wanted to show her how my broken hand is now normal again. How Bikram Yoga has given me a second chance and made me believe in the concept of second chances, but before I said anything she mentions her son wears a Janau and asks me if I do Sandhya Vandhanam every day. Told her that I do it most days but only once a day.

My Bikram Yoga attendance is better than my Sandhya Vandhanam frequency. She says "do that as well! it is good for you"

Jr. was all smiles when she said "your daughter is beautiful". Today Jr. saw almost a 100 people come out all smiling after class and line up to talk to Rajashree. It is my sincere hope she does yoga again soon. Given how busy she is with 8th grade, she could really use it. 

It was truly a "special experience" like the teachers at BYSJ told us over the last few days.

Hats off.. we should really say "Mats off" to Rajashree Choudhury, the "horse whisperer extraordinaire"!

Taking off with your body and mind..

In a sense, we are all airplanes in different shapes, sizes and colors. We are all more or less trying to use the equipment we have, to do the best we can, before the equipment (body and mind) need some major upgrades or outright fail. 

Flying airplanes needs a license. Flying your "self" doesn't.

Those piloting licenses have varying degrees of difficulty and requirements. 

Anything from 20 hours of solo flying and 15 hours of flying with a certified instructor for a small Cessna to 1500 hours of solo flying and more hours with experienced pilots to fly a Jumbo jet.

Where am I going with all this comparison?

When I started doing yoga, we were not sure if I will survive the first dozen classes. That was 100 minutes of Yoga. 

That went by fast.

The next milestone was ~ 1000 minutes of yoga or ~ 112 classes.. that also went by fast within four months. 

The next one is longer. 10,000 minutes of yoga, lets approximate to a 1000 classes. As a person who meticulously does graphs and charts and keeps track of things to get a nerds eye view of yoga, there is another 85 classes to go for the 1000'th Yoga class and a little more to go after that for 10,000 minutes in the hot room. At the rate at which I am attending, before year end, that milestone will come and go.

Then there is one more possible milestone to go, in this lifetime. 

100,000 minutes of yoga. Let's call it 10,000 classes. That should take another 37 years judging by current extrapolation, give or take. 

There are folks we know who have been doing yoga twice a day, almost every day for a decade. For them, seeing that milestone is almost a given. For the rest of us who are happy to do yoga once a day, at every chance we get, a 40 year timeframe to get there sounds about right. 

Not sure if there will be a lot of counting after a 1000 classes. Maybe there will be some lifestyle change at some point? Maybe there will be more yoga? Maybe age will catch up and there will be less? There is no predicting. 

One thing that keeps me going is that somehow, somewhere deep within, there is a realization that doing yoga is going to help me get there and the more yoga I do, the higher the chances of getting through those 37 years!

We can check back in 20 years and see a progress report. 

A very special day

Last year, the kids made me choose between spending time with them for "Father's day" or going to the usual yoga class. 

This year, thanks to the UN and Narendra Modi and a billion other folks, today is International Yoga day. So the rest of the world called me to wish a happy father's day, my MIL called me to wish me a "happy Yoga day" and we knew that there was no skipping yoga.

After class the dads get roses! First kid to hug me (after I showered of course) was going to get the rose.. but they were both very quiet. Apparently they had just made the cards and the cards were still wet!

Loved the cards. They are both doing great in the arts department.

Then we had lunch and we saw a note from the yoga studio that said "post pictures of dads doing yoga with their kids". San lined up the camera and initially the kids were reluctant and conscious of their poses.. but then they opened up nicely and were all smiles!

We have many pictures of these two trying yoga poses from years ago.. 

They decided to try the Triangle pose 

 Yes.. we have a few pentagons there.. but they can be fixed in time. The little one has had a growth spurt of sorts. Even after explaining the difference between a triangle and a pentagon, the little one goes "I am doing exactly what you are doing! so stop correcting me!". 

If there is one thing I have to teach her in life, it is "how to learn".

Step 1: Listen to your teacher

Step 2: Don't say "I already know!"

Step 3: Follow instructions to the best of your ability and understanding

After many an aborted takeoff...

We finally flew together. San did a great job and kept clicking in hopes that there will be at least one photo of these poses that will have all three of us doing the same thing. The girls kept joking, laughing and giggling throughout 

Their smiles made my day!

Finally Jr. suggested we try to sit in lotus pose and lift our bodies off the ground. Have been trying to get them to sit in lotus pose, even if for a few seconds to a minute, few times a week. 

They did it with a smile! 

Wishing everyone out there a very happy Father's day and Yoga day!

Same Same but Different

Every year, Bikram Yoga San Jose has a 60 day Challenge that starts in January. This year, I got into the Challenge reluctantly, knowing that there were three possible Asia trips in those 60 days. 

The teachers said "sign up and see how far you go. you never know". Well, they know me, alright! Once they put my name on that board (twice), it was not going to be easy to give up on the challenge. 

It was a torment. I would come back from a trip and look at my star stickers trailing behind the rest of the stars and "sigh" audibly before entering the class. My biggest challenge was accepting the possibility that I might not do 60 classes in 60 days. 

With a lot of encouragement from San and the kids as well as the teachers, and a lot of doubles (do two classes in one day, sometimes back to back) the stars all added up to 60! Finished the challenge and was off to catch a 12 hour flight. 

Given my sanity is constantly tested by a workload that fluctuates by the hour, working across multiple timezones to a point where I am constantly awake, the yoga has definitely helped me from going postal. 

This is not my first challenge. It is my third (fourth if you count the fact that MIL and me did 91 classses in our first 100 days of starting Bikram Yoga in 2011.. back then we did not know much about this Challenge).

Have written about this experience in 2013 and 2014. Went back to the blog and was missing the 2015 post. Looks like I did the usual graphs and charts, wrote about it and never hit the Publish button, thanks to fighting strange rashes that come with frequent travel?! right after the Challenge.

People call me a "technologist".. I am turning into a "technoyogist". What kind of technoyogi does a post on Yoga that involves counting to 60, without graphs and charts?! 

That kind of sums up the whole challenge. It was not steady progress like the previous two years. It was stop and go. Practiced 6 times between leaving work on Friday to coming back on Monday. My original thought was that I would be dead before Monday morning, but reality was something else. Went to work and felt great. So the number of classes you do over a weekend doesn't matter, as long as you hydrate and rest properly. Zico coconut water was and is my best friend now. If some day, I put a bar in the house for some strange reason, it will only have Zico on tap. 

Then came the surprise after the Challenge. Picked up some strange rash and most of March was a wash with work, with family and Yoga. My extended family often challenged me with things like "you do all this yoga and still get sick. maybe it is the yoga!" .. friends were talking about "yoga overdose".. and once the jokes and jibes start, the hits just keep on coming.

Doing yoga does not make you invincible. It helps you optimize your strength vs. flexibilty, makes sure your hormone glands are all firing right, and helps with your immunity so your body can fight things better. My auto immune disorder and allergies are known to everyone close to me. You bring me close to a range of things like dogs,  cats, sesame seeds, peanuts, chinese juniper, shellfish (and a long list of things) and I can go from normal to strugling in a few seconds. My body probably did a better job fighting the rash, thanks to Yoga. 

Can I prove it? No. Can I disprove it? again, No.  The Yogis in the Himalayas had a much better deal than me, because they didn't have to share recirculated air in a tin can with 400 people for 12-14 hours on a regular basis.  This was like wearing a bullet proof vest and walking into a war zone. Chances are you still get shot in the face. 

The same thing applies to the sudden outburst of emotion when I am on a call and one of my kids screams in the background. Just because you do Yoga, doesn't mean you become a stoic overnight or you become a stoic ever. There is nothing wrong with going from zero to angry in 4 seconds. What is important is how long does it take you to come from Angry to zero? if you can do it in three deep breaths with 6 seconds in and 6 seconds out (24 seconds) you got me beat. That is my bench mark today. It takes me 24 seconds (20 sometimes) to calm down from anything. That is all thanks to Yoga.

The weight tracking after every yoga class is still on. Somehow I have either put on a good 10 pounds between July to December of 2014 or the battery change in the weighing scale has reset the calibration! Will post this graph at the end of 2015 and see what it shows. Right now the weight is more or less steady at 145 +/- 2 lbs. 

Why do this Challenge at all?

Is it to feed the type A personality trait?

Is it some kind of death wish?

Is there any difference that I noticed after the 2nd and 3rd challenge ?

What did I gain by doing this?  

Did I even enjoy doing this?

Those were the most common questions I got in water cooler conversations or at kids birthday parties when the guys or ladies are talking about my Yoga experience.

So here are some answers.

The first time I did the challenge, it was purely a "type A" thing. No shame in admitting it. Everyone at the studio was going "ooh" and "aah" about how great this experience was and someone mentioned that this is "not easy" and "not everyone can do it". Well, "I am not everyone" was the theme in my life at that time.. (okay, it is a repeating theme) and we went. (we = me and my mother in law, who is a type A+ personality, who encouraged me to do it. As my only "local parent", she did the right thing and I am forever grateful to her for doing that).

When the challenge was done though, it was a humbling experience, not a power trip. It put a lot of things in perspective. One can accomplish a lot at work and home, but how far can you push your body, within a two feet by six feet space, that we call a yoga mat? Once you do the same thing regularly and continuously, your body kind of starts remembering things and you start seeing changes. I always thought this concept of "muscle memory" was a bunch of bull. I was wrong! My abs never looked better than after that 60 days. 

The second time, I signed up, because January to March is Flu season here. The previous year, I had successfully managed to evade the flu, in spite of everyone in the house having it. Thought of the Challenge as a flu beater and it did help. My work was crazy in 2014 and at the time and the challenge kept me sane.

This time the learning was different. No two challenges are alike. Different year, different set of issues that have to be overcome. Also realized that poses that were not favorites the previous year, became my "look forward to" poses in the next year and vice versa.  It just shows how your body changes over time. At the end of this challenge I really wanted to ask my teacher if she will write me a recommendation for teacher training. My family and collegues nicely reminded me of my commitments, and I put that wish in the "after this job is done" list.

This year, it was probably a type A thing as well. I was fighting with myself and I won. Could not accept the thought of not finishing after signing up. Do not know if that is a good or bad thing. Sometimes I do not like the me, that stares back from the mirror. Do not understand why it is acceptance of that person that I seek, instead of a determined fight to change that person. Maybe that is the first step to eventually changing?

If you have done the challenge multiple times, the biggest changes you will see, are with your breath and your thought process. The poses are not going to magically improve because you do the challenge. Not in depth anyways. Your form will improve but that is something I have learnt to cherish only after many a teacher has knocked it into my pig head that "form is more important than depth". Even today, the teacher told us "going 90 miles per hour into a ditch is not the goal here. Going straight and steady at 35 miles per hour will still get you places".

If you are doing this challenge for the 2nd or 3rd or n-th time, chances are, you are a regular, and every day is a challenge for you. Still, you get to literally see your body change radically over a two month timeframe. Your core strength improves by orders of magnitude!

However, if you have just started on this journey, it is quite a treat to go through this experience. You WILL see changes with your body and your mind. 

The last question always puts a smile on my face. Do you enjoy doing this? That is a tough one. In all honesty, every class, no matter weather the starting state was one of euphoria or depresssion, ends the same way. I come out singing inside my hear in Gloria Gaynor's voice "and I .. I will survive.. and I survived that 90 minutes of fighting, with my body and my mind".

Not sure if anyone in that room actually "enjoys" it while the class is going on. Mostly folks stare at themselves with a frustrated, constipated or angry face except when the teachers crack a joke or remind people to smile. There are three ladies who are an exception to this. They always have a smile on their face. Either they are seasoned pro's, or air hostesses who cannot undo their smiles. Those are my theories.

Every Yoga class is like making mysore pak for me.  It takes forever to make it and you sweat it out in the kitchen, standing in front of a hot stove, but when you taste the sweet after it is done, it was all worth the effort! Walking back to the car after class, looking up at the sky, smelling the cold air (it is usually cold compared to the hot room) and driving back in silence knowing you are better off today than yesterday, always makes the hard work in the class, worth it.

Definitely recommend trying a Challenge. There is a good chance that you will surprise yourself with what you find out about your own abilities! 

Waxing, Tampons and the power of ideas

Yes, Yes.. it is one of those posts that is Kryptonite for some of my friends.. brings all those taboo blog topics into one single post! 

Most of you saw my recent rant on Facebook about switching to Nike swimwear instead of my tried and trusted Dolphin shorts, for Bikram Yoga class and the disastrous side effects of ripping hair off.  Given that I was one step shy of becoming Sanjay Ramaswami, and gave valuable feedback to the shorts industry, there are still not that many good options for Men's yoga shorts.

Earlier this week, my classmate suggested : Why not wear a "komanam" and do yoga?

For those of you who are unfamiliar with the concept, a "komanam" or "langot" is just the way people in India used to wear a cloth folded into a string around the waist. It is probably the oldest known design for an underwear that was also the "only wear", and fit a multi purpose design and functionality for

- poor men who could not afford anything more

- saints and monks who have given up everything and wanted to show they "minimized" on material comforts

- default clothing for kids 

- athletic wear for wrestlers, fighters and Yoga practitioners

While searching for why my grandfather was the last one in our family to wear this, and how the VIP Frenchie/ Jockey has dinosaured the Komanam in South India, came across many interesting links. Some of these links while educational, may not be considered safe for work.

Also learned that this was the best way to protect wrestlers from "rupturing their groins". Why would anyone indulge in an activity that would potentially rupture their groins? is beyond me.  Anyway, lets move on..

If you look at Yogis whose name has made it to the western world, you can see that the lowest common denominator for apparel from Thirumalai Krishnamacharya, BKS Iyengar (man had same style from his 30's to 90's) , Pattabhi Jois, Baba Ramdev, Bishnu Ghosh, and my favorite , or a group of Yogis (this one is from 2013), the choice seems to be either a "Komanam" aka "Langot" or a speedo! 

In order of preference for a hot yoga class, suggest men go as close to the right as possible. Refer picture below that shows three things I have worn to class with the first two making it very difficult.

Now what does my friends suggestion have to do with tampons and the power of ideas?

There is a back story from 2009. It started with an India trip and accupuncture. Hindsight being 20/20 or better, that might not have been required if I had found hot yoga earlier! Two classes would have fixed it. Think the hot lamp did as much work as the needles and the voltages.  

The accupuncture only fixed it temporarily. Within a few months, my feet started hurting. So off I went to the hospital and they said my foot was flat and the "arch" was disappearing. Then we had to go measure the flatness of the foot and get new customized inserts for the shoes, socks with elastic in them, etc.. None of that was helping anyone except the hospital and the shoe store. Part of the problem was that I could not wear these sneakers at work, especially given the formal wear didn't go with the sneakers!

Then a colleague saw me limping and said "why don't you take a tampon and put it in your shoes?".

Came home and thought about it. Hmm.. tampons in your shoes? Why not? Then I realized that Sanitary napkins would be a better bet, given they have a sticker which can be used to stick it to the sole and I can custom cut them to any shape!

When San came home that evening, I asked her "Can you give me a sanitary napkin?"

Her reaction was a kodak moment. It is not everyday that your hubby asks you for a sanitary napkin. Being lost for words, she pointed me to a cabinet.

Took a napkin, cut it in two pieces to match what would have been my arch and nicely stuck the two pieces into the shoes after peeling off the sticker. The next day I went to work with my napkin fixed formal shoes and was walking comfortably. Why not? It was like walking on a cotton cloud! Guess the added benefit to doing this was that any extra moisture inside the shoes is absorbed by the napkin and it makes for a more comfortable walking experience. 

This went on for two days and I told my colleage "By the way, thanks for your idea! It has changed my life" .. He spit out his coffee. Apparently he was being sarcastic and was joking. I told him that he has no idea, how good his ideas are, because he doesn't take them seriously. 

There is also a lesson in this for inventors. Patent the idea, even if you never plan to put it in practice or implement it. Some other guy like me, who is not afraid to try those ideas, might come along and actually put it in practice and it might work, very well! 

Well, now you know the back story of why giving me ideas comes with its pros and cons.. 

Might actually try them!